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SteadyGosling

Harassment, or atleast I feel like I’m being harassed...

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I feel like I’ve never brought this into a public scale with the forums, but here’s a short way to simplify what I’m trying to say.

For the past year, as a female player i really cannot tell you I’ve Gone a day without getting called vulgar and inappropriate shit (even after I tell them I’m 15 and to stop clearly). This is what the main driving away factor is currently, isn’t the game but honestly the fan base... 

Im 15, but even after i point that out, I still get called sexual and vulgar shit on here. 

Also here’s a main point, Every single time I’ve played this game, which could be around thousands of times now, I can’t get by without being targeted after clearly they’ve made me uncomfortable, and though my friends I play with who are a bit older than me know better and always defend me, this toxic part of the fan base (College guys who think everyone wants them), atleast I’m presuming, is probably one of the biggest forces driving players away that we never talked about. 

We need a real report system, and we need REAL BANS. Especially when shit like this happens. 

 

I hope I didn’t trigger anyone, and I’m sorry if I did something wrong with this post or it goes against your opinion, but I’m honestly done with this shit, and I feel like bringing it here publicly will help me start conversation about this and help me almost cope in a sense. Thank you!

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Unfortunately, this is the internet and anyone can be as much of an asshole as they want to be because there is no repercussions.  

As to bans, the game is losing players left and right as it is, steam numbers for the past 30 days is something like 350 different people playing.  If there are bans, those numbers go even lower and might go lower to a point that no one plays.  

I'm not trying to downplay your plight at all, it's a serious thing, but again people are assholes and the game can't afford to lose players.  So you're stuck with playing in party chat with your friends, not talking at all in QP lobbies OR muting the idiots when they become idiots.

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Sorry you've had bad experiences, but in these situations, it's on you to take charge.  Either outright mute these douchebags or just leave lobbies until you find a "friendly" one.  A report system for bullshit teenage highschool behavior (whether it be from an actual teen or a lippy adult) won't do anything.  They're still going to act the same with other people because they know they will get a rise out of them.  Also, not to harp on you too much, but this is an M rated game.  17 is the recommended age to be playing and interacting with others online.  By this point, you shouldn't be letting this kind of crap bother you.  Find a new lobby or pop in a different game and try later.

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5 minutes ago, RustInPeace said:

Sorry you've had bad experiences, but in these situations, it's on you to take charge.  Either outright mute these douchebags or just leave lobbies until you find a "friendly" one.  A report system for bullshit teenage highschool behavior (whether it be from an actual teen or a lippy adult) won't do anything.  They're still going to act the same with other people because they know they will get a rise out of them.  Also, not to harp on you too much, but this is an M rated game.  17 is the recommended age to be playing and interacting with others online.  By this point, you shouldn't be letting this kind of crap bother you.  Find a new lobby or pop in a different game and try later.

I understand the argument that a report system won’t make changes, I was just arguing that the one we have in place doesn’t work as it is.

 

i always do take charge in these situations, and do what I need to, but the main topic of this post was that it happens in general. Wether or not I’m 15, saying it then hearing a pedo response doesn’t more than just make 1 person in the lobby uncomfortable. It ruins the whole game, and these people ruin the whole game for anyone.

also I understand the whole rating situation, but there’s a fine line between getting in an argument with annoying trolls, and getting your whole day ruined because you were called a slut, (troll behavior), but then sexually harassed and talked about in such manner. The shit I’ve seen people do like this crosses that line.

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1 hour ago, SteadyGosling said:

I understand the argument that a report system won’t make changes, I was just arguing that the one we have in place doesn’t work as it is.

 

i always do take charge in these situations, and do what I need to, but the main topic of this post was that it happens in general. Wether or not I’m 15, saying it then hearing a pedo response doesn’t more than just make 1 person in the lobby uncomfortable. It ruins the whole game, and these people ruin the whole game for anyone.

also I understand the whole rating situation, but there’s a fine line between getting in an argument with annoying trolls, and getting your whole day ruined because you were called a slut, (troll behavior), but then sexually harassed and talked about in such manner. The shit I’ve seen people do like this crosses that line.

I have a daughter who used to play f13 regularly at 13, may I suggest adding cool players to game with? Granted now there are far less cool players who regularly play, but when you come across one add them. Add me, I'm redrum138. I play on weekends, at least most weekends. RustinPeace is one of my friends who still play, and we have others as well. My daughter hardly plays f13 anymore, she switched to fortnite. But, best I can say is if the talk bothers you then mute them. Girl gamers have it rough, I know my daughter got called all kinds of crap. But, now she just laughs at them. If you can play it off and be cool, the trolls will get bored. They seek misery, that's their pleasure. Deny them!

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1 hour ago, Redrum138 said:

I have a daughter who used to play f13 regularly at 13, may I suggest adding cool players to game with? Granted now there are far less cool players who regularly play, but when you come across one add them. Add me, I'm redrum138. I play on weekends, at least most weekends. RustinPeace is one of my friends who still play, and we have others as well. My daughter hardly plays f13 anymore, she switched to fortnite. But, best I can say is if the talk bothers you then mute them. Girl gamers have it rough, I know my daughter got called all kinds of crap. But, now she just laughs at them. If you can play it off and be cool, the trolls will get bored. They seek misery, that's their pleasure. Deny them!

Thank you for the support, I play with others 100% of the time, and it’s always them who comes in to help me out. What version do you play on?

I think I may have come across you at one point or another, I’m sorry if we had any conflict at those times aswell :)

I’ve been playing with what I can say is probably every single day I can, since I got this game, and it’s nice to see people like you who have stories, and who can help relate on subjects like these. Thank you for your response! ❤️

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15 minutes ago, SteadyGosling said:

Thank you for the support, I play with others 100% of the time, and it’s always them who comes in to help me out. What version do you play on?

I think I may have come across you at one point or another, I’m sorry if we had any conflict at those times aswell :)

I’ve been playing with what I can say is probably every single day I can, since I got this game, and it’s nice to see people like you who have stories, and who can help relate on subjects like these. Thank you for your response! ❤️

Sure, no problem. I'm on ps4, might have been in a lobby together before. My daughter and I played the game non stop for about a year and a half before she quit, I still play and have met just about everyone on ps4 for good or bad. 😆

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4 hours ago, SteadyGosling said:

 

Im 15, but even after i point that out, I still get called sexual and vulgar shit on here. 

This game is rated 18+..   But what ever..

Its your job to mute or block people who bother you.. The game devs can't police the game.  Why does it matter what random people say or think?  

Most of the girls I play with don't really care either way.  If its funny, they laugh.  If its annoying, they talk smack back.  If it just becomes nails on a chalk board they just mute the player.

 

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Welcome to the internet. Sadly there will be always desperate people out there, in this case being those college guys you mentioned.

Best thing you can do is to communicate with the friends you're playing with in a party chat or in discord chat maybe. If you want to stay in game chat then I suggest you to mute the people harassing you or just ignore them and shrug their toxicity off.

Regarding the report thing, I think it's more of a Sony/Microsoft/Steam issue rather than the game's fault y'know. If they send you nasty and sexual messages you can report them and I'm sure that Sony will take action.

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2 hours ago, mike-hannigan said:

I think it's more of a Sony/Microsoft/Steam issue rather than the game's fault y'know. If they send you nasty and sexual messages you can report them and I'm sure that Sony will take action.

@SteadyGosling, this. If it crosses into sexual harassment report them.

If you’re on PS4, my name’s the same on there and you’re welcome to join me, I’ll gladly harass them right back. Same goes for on here if you have an issue tag me. No one should have to put up with that shit. Take Red and Rust up on their offer too, their good guys.

Don’t listen to anyone who says you shouldn’t be playing because of your age, Moe was quite a bit younger than you and she was an awesome community member. You got just as much right to enjoy the franchise as anyone else. 

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21 minutes ago, Slasher_Clone said:

 

Don’t listen to anyone who says you shouldn’t be playing because of your age, Moe was quite a bit younger than you and she was an awesome community member. You got just as much right to enjoy the franchise as anyone else. 

Agree completely with this. 

I was a 6 year old kid when I first saw Halloween.  I saw Friday Part VI in the theater with my dad as part of my 9th birthday gift.  It came out right before my birthday.  He got me into horror films and I appreciate him doing so.  

All of us did shit when we were under the age of 17 that technically we weren't really supposed to.  There's no right to judge anyone on any of it. 

I do have to wonder when I'm playing at 2am, when it's a school night, and start hearing young kids on the mic though.  Not gonna lie there. 

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Either play with no mic at all, mute the toxic people, or just talk to ur friends in party chat only. Problem solved 

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@SteadyGosling, it's unfortunate you are having this problem. It is an issue that's been going on for quite a while. I have a daughter that is a bit younger, and she loves playing this game. She plays mostly private matches these days with her sisters, me and her mother, or her schoolmates. If you can find some really decent people to consistently play with in private matches, consider doing that.

10 hours ago, SirMang said:

Unfortunately, this is the internet and anyone can be as much of an asshole as they want to be because there is no repercussions.

There are some repercussions, just not enough.

7 hours ago, Redrum138 said:

I have a daughter who used to play f13 regularly at 13, may I suggest adding cool players to game with? Granted now there are far less cool players who regularly play, but when you come across one add them. Add me, I'm redrum138. I play on weekends, at least most weekends. RustinPeace is one of my friends who still play, and we have others as well. My daughter hardly plays f13 anymore, she switched to fortnite. But, best I can say is if the talk bothers you then mute them. Girl gamers have it rough, I know my daughter got called all kinds of crap. But, now she just laughs at them. If you can play it off and be cool, the trolls will get bored. They seek misery, that's their pleasure. Deny them!

My daughter is back and forth between this game, Dead By Daylight, and Fortnite.

1 hour ago, SirMang said:

There's no right to judge anyone on any of it. 

I do have to wonder when I'm playing at 2am, when it's a school night, and start hearing young kids on the mic though.  Not gonna lie there. 

I agree that passing judgment doesn't help anyone.

Is it possible that when you are playing at 2 a.m., the children may be from other parts of the world?

35 minutes ago, DontZzz34 said:

Either play with no mic at all, mute the toxic people, or just talk to ur friends in party chat only. Problem solved 

These are just quick fixes for a problem that will never get a proper solution. Sometimes I wonder if trolls act a fool just to be intentionally muted.

An equally effective solution would be to hand their collective asses to them as Jason.

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1 minute ago, Fair Play said:

 

Is it possible that when you are playing at 2 a.m., the children may be from other parts of the world?

 

It is, because anyone can get dumped into any server.  I've found myself in the EU servers before.

But you can tell a British accent over an American accent.

So I'm talking kids who are going to be anywhere between 11pm and 2am...I'm in NY. 

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3 minutes ago, SirMang said:

It is, because anyone can get dumped into any server.  I've found myself in the EU servers before.

But you can tell a British accent over an American accent.

So I'm talking kids who are going to be anywhere between 11pm and 2am...I'm in NY. 

There's gonna be kids so addicted to this game, that they are willing to forego on sleep to enjoy it.

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6 hours ago, Slasher_Clone said:

@SteadyGosling, this. If it crosses into sexual harassment report them.

If you’re on PS4, my name’s the same on there and you’re welcome to join me, I’ll gladly harass them right back. Same goes for on here if you have an issue tag me. No one should have to put up with that shit. Take Red and Rust up on their offer too, their good guys.

Don’t listen to anyone who says you shouldn’t be playing because of your age, Moe was quite a bit younger than you and she was an awesome community member. You got just as much right to enjoy the franchise as anyone else. 

 

5 hours ago, SirMang said:

Agree completely with this. 

I was a 6 year old kid when I first saw Halloween.  I saw Friday Part VI in the theater with my dad as part of my 9th birthday gift.  It came out right before my birthday.  He got me into horror films and I appreciate him doing so.  

All of us did shit when we were under the age of 17 that technically we weren't really supposed to.  There's no right to judge anyone on any of it. 

I do have to wonder when I'm playing at 2am, when it's a school night, and start hearing young kids on the mic though.  Not gonna lie there. 

 

4 hours ago, Fair Play said:

@SteadyGosling, it's unfortunate you are having this problem. It is an issue that's been going on for quite a while. I have a daughter that is a bit younger, and she loves playing this game. She plays mostly private matches these days with her sisters, me and her mother, or her schoolmates. If you can find some really decent people to consistently play with in private matches, consider doing that.

There are some repercussions, just not enough.

My daughter is back and forth between this game, Dead By Daylight, and Fortnite.

I agree that passing judgment doesn't help anyone.

Is it possible that when you are playing at 2 a.m., the children may be from other parts of the world?

These are just quick fixes for a problem that will never get a proper solution. Sometimes I wonder if trolls act a fool just to be intentionally muted.

An equally effective solution would be to hand their collective asses to them as Jason.

Thank you guys for your feedback and stories, it means a lot to see parents such as you guys witnessing situations like these. I appreciate all the love, and thanks to those who were willing to let me join you! I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to join sadly as my main is PC, but I do play ps4 every now and then, so I might see you all.

Its different to see adults on the topic, as many I’ve come across when speaking about this are rather young but don’t really say anything other than “mute them” or something along those lines. So I would like to thank you for having this important conversation with me, and for giving me your time ❤️ 

I hope your parenting goes well! And I hope you guys continue to enjoy the game :) 

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1 hour ago, SteadyGosling said:

Thank you guys for your feedback and stories, it means a lot to see parents such as you guys witnessing situations like these. I appreciate all the love, and thanks to those who were willing to let me join you! I can’t guarantee that I’ll be able to join sadly as my main is PC, but I do play ps4 every now and then, so I might see you all.

Its different to see adults on the topic, as many I’ve come across when speaking about this are rather young but don’t really say anything other than “mute them” or something along those lines. So I would like to thank you for having this important conversation with me, and for giving me your time ❤️ 

I hope your parenting goes well! And I hope you guys continue to enjoy the game :) 

I hope you continue to enjoy the game as well. The community needs to pull together to keep this game thriving for as long as possible.

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10 hours ago, Fair Play said:

These are just quick fixes for a problem that will never get a proper solution. Sometimes I wonder if trolls act a fool just to be intentionally muted.

An equally effective solution would be to hand their collective asses to them as Jason.

These quick fixes are the best way to go about it. When u respond and let them get a rise out of you, you’re giving them exactly what they want. It’s best to just ignore people who talk shit or harass someone over a mic. There really isn’t much of a solution to the problem except what I suggested. These type of players are always going to exist in any game you play. 

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my daughter and niece play and they're 10! they don't go in to game chat so they never hear what anyone is saying! (which is for their protection AND the other gamers protection!) trust me everytime they scream when Jason finds them would break your eardrums 🤣 although their commentary is quite entertaining! like when they are Jason and grab someone you'll hear "awe, you need a hug! here let me give you a goodbye hug" or ooh my you have a headache? I can fix that! then squeezes their head to death 😂. point being if you dont have to go in game chat then definitely dont!! but if you do.. stay quiet for a bit and listen to what's being said, you can tell fairly quickly which ones to mute before things get going.

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9 hours ago, DontZzz34 said:

These quick fixes are the best way to go about it. When u respond and let them get a rise out of you, you’re giving them exactly what they want. . 

Exception being if you're into it..

 

 

 

 

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16 hours ago, DontZzz34 said:

These quick fixes are the best way to go about it. When u respond and let them get a rise out of you, you’re giving them exactly what they want. It’s best to just ignore people who talk shit or harass someone over a mic. There really isn’t much of a solution to the problem except what I suggested. These type of players are always going to exist in any game you play. 

Most of us know all too well to avoid playing into the antics of trolls. If trolls had better sense, we wouldn't have to spend so much time ignoring or avoiding the worst of the worst in this and any other gaming community.

11 hours ago, bronzy1 said:

my daughter and niece play and they're 10! they don't go in to game chat so they never hear what anyone is saying! (which is for their protection AND the other gamers protection!) trust me everytime they scream when Jason finds them would break your eardrums 🤣 although their commentary is quite entertaining! like when they are Jason and grab someone you'll hear "awe, you need a hug! here let me give you a goodbye hug" or ooh my you have a headache? I can fix that! then squeezes their head to death 😂. point being if you dont have to go in game chat then definitely dont!! but if you do.. stay quiet for a bit and listen to what's being said, you can tell fairly quickly which ones to mute before things get going.

I applaud you for being a parent who monitors their children playing this game.

10 hours ago, F134Ever86 said:

You're absolutely right. Unfortunately a lot of gamers are very immature. 

Sad but true.

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On 5/4/2019 at 6:34 PM, SirMang said:

Agree completely with this. 

I was a 6 year old kid when I first saw Halloween.  I saw Friday Part VI in the theater with my dad as part of my 9th birthday gift.  It came out right before my birthday.  He got me into horror films and I appreciate him doing so.  

All of us did shit when we were under the age of 17 that technically we weren't really supposed to.  There's no right to judge anyone on any of it. 

I do have to wonder when I'm playing at 2am, when it's a school night, and start hearing young kids on the mic though.  Not gonna lie there. 

Over a year ago, I was playing in the middle of the night when I heard some parent bust into a kid’s room and begin shouting at the kid for playing video games when he should be in bed. It was hysterical!

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Sorry to hear, but Im a 35yold male and I get called all types of shit in this game too. Heck i've been solicited sexual acts(from male and female) to not kill them in game and what not multiple times over. Nothing you can do but laugh it off. Sticks and stones. I know thats like an 80s/90s saying, but they really need to bring that back. People are getting way too soft these days...

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